One of the most well known groups of Mordenvale are known as The Grogs, which are described by Somerled of Redcliffe as follows:
What is a Grog?
I am sure that every one has a different idea. A grog is usually a heavy fighter in the SCA. A grog usually comes from Mordenvale. A Grog will pretend to have an IQ of um, less than many. It is a grogs duty to be a shock-troop, and at his leaders command to charge the biggest thing on the field. Most grogs drink. A lot.
How do I become a Grog?
First you must train as a GIT*. You must be an authorized fighter, preferably heavy. You must fight at least one, preferably three or more, Wars wearing a Grog Tabard and fighting as part of the Shield-wall. You must fight a best-of-eleven against the previous grog or a grog of equal skill. If you do something either heroic or idiotic you may earn your grog name.
*What does the asterisk near GIT mean?
A GIT is a Grog in Training. All GITs are GIT number one because we cannot tell the difference between them. Grogs tell the GITs what Ragnar says (Sir Ragnar Magnússon).
How were Grogs invented?
A grog is a creature from the RPG Ars Magica. It was a humanoid fighter type whose only task was to be slain in droves by uber-powerful wizards. The shield-grog was invented by Boris about eight years ago (~1997) during his first war in Politarchopolis in which they thought it amusing to pretend to be stupid, uncouth brutes.
How do Grogs Count?
Badly. If a grog is really confused then every number is one. In a war grogs can count to three, because they all know what comes next. Once a grog either becomes a sergeant (good) or a squire (so they can chase archers because they’re too scared to fight in the wall) then they learn how to count in the Grogicimal system. This system is base four. E.g, 1, 2, 3, many. Many 1, many 2, many 3, many many.
The decimal 16 equates to lots in the Grogicimal system. E.g. 21 is lots, many, 1
The term all of them applies technically to the decimal 64 or higher but can mean any number greater than three at times.
Thus you may hear comments from Grogs like There are many pointy hats over there, I have had lots to drink, and who cares, lets just charge them!
The Grogs are each given a ‘Grog name’. For example, Grogus Eucalyptus was the name given to a Grog who charged in a war and hit a tree. Grogus Pinkus Mistus was the name given to the Grog who absorbed multiple rounds from the Lemmings Household’s cannon in war. Other Grog names include Grogus Deadus and Grogus Incognito.
Another thing to know about The Grogs are their ever-useful escape clause: Ragnar told me to do it!